Christine’s Pink Mittens
By Sally Haas
“Maybe the mother’s a little odd!”
I could feel their stares and hear imaginary whispers as I walked my three year old daughter Christine from the car across the endless parking lot to the dentist’s office. It was a brutally hot day in July and Christine was sporting a new pair of bright pink mittens that her Nana had sent her from California. My mother can never pass up a sale and bright pink mittens were the hit of the day.
When Christine opened the UPS box addressed directly to her and saw a pair of bright pink mittens with smiling bunny faces she saw no need to wait for snow. She threw herself over the box and quickly put on her Christmas in July prize. And that was that! Every effort I made to remove the mittens was met with tears and cries of “No! My pink mittens!”
That’s the glory of being three – you can do what you want, be who you want, dress as you want and everybody will say you’re “cute” or “adorable” – because you are. It’s the mother holding the bright pink smiling bunny mitten hand that is worried about being put away.
You’ve seen it on the street – a bubbling boy wearing a bucket on his head, a giddy six year old girl with her face painted like a tiger or a preschooler wearing his shoes on the wrong feet That is the ultimate freedom and joy of living!
“What is she doing to that poor little girl?” “Doesn’t she care that the heat index is at 98 degrees?” “Who would think of such a thing?” The imaginary voices follow me through the parking lot as I make a final plea to my daughter to “Please, please Christine, take the mittens off!” …. “No my pink mittens!” Defeated, I hold Christine’s hand as we make our way into the dentist’s building and onto the elevator. Running late because of our latest crisis, we squeeze in with staring, gaping disbelievers as the door closes,
Christine is beaming as she examines fuzzy ear tips even as small beads of sweat form on her forehead. “Excuse me Ma’am.” A delicate finger taps me on the shoulder. “Isn’t it a little warm for mittens today?” I writhe as my thoughts become life. I shiver as I feel the heat of embarrassment. And then I decide to rise to the occasion and leave my elevator friends with something to ponder.
“No! It certainly is not too hot!” I reply in my most fierce deep tone. “Nana sent Christine pink mittens from California today and she’s going to wear them!”
|
Sally Edwards is a professional key note speaker, corporate humorist and standup comedienne who began her career studying improvisation at Chicago’s Second City. Sally has been featured on Showtime’s Comedy Club Network, A&E and NBC TV’s Friday Night. Sally is now a frequent guest on WGN Radio with Steve Cochran. |
